Sunday night I had sex with a trucker in his sleeper, parked behind Walmart. It was great, of course. Thanks, Growlr! Details to follow…
Archive for Sex
If I had a dollar for every time…
You can click on the pic to make it larger and, perhaps, a little easier to read.
New skool ignorance [Updated]
I don't even know where to begin.
First of all, this guy (with a Grindr profile photo of some shrubbery!) is 20 years-old! I've been HIV+ since before he was born! I'm not about to be schooled in “proper” HIV+ sex practices by him. Please.
Secondly, Grindr really isn’t the place for this sort of discussion unless we were planning to hook up which we weren’t. His initial message to me arrived out of nowhere. I don’t initiate contact with youngsters, especially anonymous ones.
Finally, my sex life is no one’s business except mine and those I choose to share it with, even though this blog might indicate otherwise. The same goes for my T-Cell count and Viral Load, so STFU, Mary, unless you were invited which you weren’t.
It would be nice if this kind of “sex shaming” would end in the age of PrEP and HAART. I guess there will always be ignorant young people.
FYI: The risk is essentially eliminated, not “huge.”
I guess my problem with this whole episode is not that he’s ignorant of the facts. Most people are, really. It’s that he is so loud about his ignorance and he’s decided to spread it around. I had hoped that, in the five years when I was off the market, things had changed. I guess not.
UPDATE: I sent a link to this blog post to Mr. Shrubbery. He blocked me, of course.
The other me
I’m not always sitting at the computer typing, as if anyone cares about anything I have to say. Sometimes I sit at the computer maintaining an adult web site, unconnected with this one. (That’s a picture of me, hard at work, on the left.) Things were going along quite nicely for years with minimum effort, providing me with an adequate income. Then everything changed.
iBill, the company who processes the credit card payments for my site, started having some financial problems. Actually, they were huge financial problems. They continued taking my customers’ monthy subscription fees but stopped paying me. In fact, they haven’t made a pay-out since the 1st of October. iBill is the largest company in the world who provide this service, so I’m not alone in this, by the way. They didn’t bother telling anyone about this situation until two days before they stopped payments. As of January 1, 2005, they will be holding three months worth of what is, for all intents and purposes, my salary. After three months of excuses on their web site and many unreturned phone calls, I’m essentially broke.
I know, boo-hoo, poor, destitute pornographer. Who cares? Well, I ain’t asking for sympathy, I'm just ranting and getting this out there.
I can switch to another company and have actually started that process. Unfortunately, it involves paying a hefty yearly “registration fee” required by VISA for “high risk” (meaning adult) sites. Since I haven’t been paid in such a long time this will essentially clean me out. Also, this will only be for my new customers. My other customers, some of whom have been with me for years will continue to pay money to iBill which I, most likely, will never see. Word on the adult webmaster street is that iBill will declare bankruptcy and the thousands of people they owe money to will be up the proverbial creek.
The InterNext porn convention is in Las Vegas next week. If iBill has a presence there’and they normally do’they will be converged upon by angry customers. And they certainly should be. If they don’t show up, they’ll be sending a really depressing message to their customers. We’ll see, I guess. The guys I’m staying with will be attending the convention. I’ll keep you informed.
More Johnny Bravo
I got a nice Christmas e-mail from Johnny Bravo, my straight buddy on WebCamNow the other day. God knows how he found out about it, but he thanked me for my previous posting about him and assured me he will get in touch when he’s in NOLA next year. I was fuckin’ floored! I was afraid he’d be pissed off or something. Anyway, he asked if I’d like some naked pics. Hell yeah, I would!! So, he sent some along, taken last Thursday, and said I could feel free to post them. Here’s one of them. I’ll post more in the next week or so. Thank God straight men don't shave their butt hair! I have nothing more to say.
Thanks, Johnny!!
The Phoenix
Between the non-excitement of “the holidays,” being sick and discovering my favorite album of the year, I nearly forgot that I went to The Phoenix last night. Even though it was a Sunday night, I figured, since it was the night after Christmas, it might be at least a little busy. Downstairs was dead, upstairs there were, maybe, two dozen men total, including the guys sitting at the bar.
Ric and Ken were upstairs getting into some ass play. When they were ready to head out they asked if I wanted to go home with them. I was there to get off and go home, so I declined. Luckily, Ken is in town through New Years so the three of us can get some play in during the week.
The bench area was kind of empty, so I headed to the bathroom. It was packed. I got rock hard instantly, not surprising considering it’s been a week since I’ve even thought about my dick. There were two guys there I liked a lot but they didn’t seem interested. A third guy, though, ended up being just what I was looking for. He was a big, beefy blonde, with a nice, scruffy beard and inch thick hair spread over his chest and belly. He had a fat dick, too, and was a great kisser, but when he saw that I had a PA he dropped his pants and bent over. I fucked his hairy hole while he urged me on and a bunch of guys in the room helped us out. He turned around before I shot, we made out for a while and I got to enjoy his beautiful chest hair. I took a little break. Man, it felt fucking great to be out again!
The blonde guy was out by the benches later and ready for more, so we went at it again. It was more comfortable because he could lean on the bench get his ass lower for me. I dropped my pants and fucked him really deep. Again, we stopped before I shot my load. Next to us an hot, bearded, hairy guy was getting comfortable, sitting on a man’s dick. He started kissing me and another guy got on his knees and finished me off. I never did see his face but he got a week’s worth of my cum in his throat. I pulled up my pants, zipped up and headed home.
Cigar Daddy?
Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.
Getting used to being called Daddy was painful but, at least, I didn’t have to do much. Saying, “Good boy!” every now and then during sex, stupid as it felt, seemed to do the trick. I slowly got used to it, mostly because it got me laid. Then I posted profile pictures of myself smoking a cigar and things really changed. Now I’m supposed to somehow incorporate cigar smoking into fucking. I’m not very verbal during sex to begin with. I prefer keeping my mouth shut and making intimate eye-contact. It was easy to sit back and enjoy a great blow job and a good cigar at the same time. Now I have to blow smoke at my “boy” and use my brain to come up with “hot” things to say, like “How do you like sucking your cigar-smoking Daddy-bear’s dick?” That sounds preposterous to me in any situation. While I’m getting my dick sucked it’s an incredible distraction.
When I first started smoking cigars, I thought, “I must really look like a pretentious asshole.” I took some pictures of myself with my camera phone just to prove to myself that I should never smoke a cigar in front of anyone. Surprisingly, I looked good! Damn. I figured, what the hell, I need new pics anyway, so I performed some Photoshop magic to make them acceptable for public consumption—mostly making sure my eyes weren’t Frankenstein-like black holes—and I posted them. The e-mail started pouring in. Suddenly I was popular again!
I know. Everyone should have such problems at 51. Humor me.
Sexual role-playing is something I’ve always tried to avoid, since, for me, it restricts intimacy. (I’m not sure what role-playing and other sexual accessories mean for other people. I could be shallow and say they’re trying to work out some childhood trauma but I don’t really believe it.) It might seem strange to regular readers of this blog but intimacy is ultimately what I'm after. For me, man-to-man sex, even with someone whose face I never see and whose name I don’t care about, is not only a unique, necessary and irreplaceable expression of male intimacy but it’s an important political act as well. Forget about running around in the woods, drumming in the nude. Having sex with each other is the one important ritual that has lasted through the milennia and the one that still means something.
There are a lot of people—even, depressing to say, gay people—who want us to believe that sex without what Rufus Wainwright calls “the steel-eyed vampire of love” is wrong. Don’t believe them. They want to destroy you. Remember, sex is GOOD.
Wow. And I was just going to write about a disappointing sexual encounter I had last night.
Anyway, this guy wrote to me every day for about a week, saying he was going to be stoppping in NOLA for a night on his way from Austin TX to Florida and that he really wanted to get together with a “cigar-smoking Daddy” like ME. He couldn’t stop yapping about it online. I got multiple IMs and e-mails every day. Besides hating that kind of pressure to perform, I start to think a guy’s insane or high or something.
Still, I met him early last night in his hotel room. He was really good-looking, despite not looking like his pictures, taller and younger-looking than I thought he’d be. So-far, so-good. His scenario was that he would blow me while I smoked a cigar and then I’d shoot a load in his ass. I think it would have worked for me if there was a comfortable chair in his room. I know it sounds like a minor complaint but, like I said, I’m not very comfortable in this role to begin with, so I couldn’t sustain it just standing there looking down at the top of his head and around the room. Don’t get me wrong, he was good, the problem was completely my own. Luckily, my erection was strong and I figured we ought to move on to Act Two. He wanted to ride me and he was very good at it. Eventually I figured I wasn’t going to be able to give him the load he wanted, at least not in that position and we ended up beating off together.
I was disappointed but he insisted he loved it. I went home and stared at the computer screen the rest of the night. I guess I was satisfied, too, since I was home by 9:30 and didn’t go out again. Who knows? Maybe I’m better at this than I give myself credit for. Oooh, that’s a good one!
Staying in
For the very first Friday night since I moved here, I didn’t go to The Phoenix. Expect Hell to freeze over any minute. I’m not sure if I was too lazy or I’m just smartening up a little.
I am meeting a man from out-of-town around dinner time tomorrow and he expects a lot. Now that should be interesting! I’m the first thing on his New Orleans agenda. Oy, the pressure.
Good night.
Party
NOLAKOC (New Orleans Krewe of Crisco) had their monthly fetish party tonight at the Uptown dungeon. Given recent non-events, I decided it would be a good idea to be armed with some Levitra. I’m glad I did, too, because there were thirty-three men there! Incredible! There was something for everyone, assuming ‘everyone’ is into kink of some kind or another. As usual, the main course was fisting but there was also some SM, water-sports and a large dildo attached to a Milwaukee Sawzall, among other things. I got to meet some men in person who I’d talked to online, too, which was great.
The usual suspects were there but I hardly had time to play with any of them. It was great to see Kevin, a friend from Baton Rouge who came to my place in Provincetown two years ago. Aside from being a hot, talented and insatiable fisting bottom, he’s a sweet, warm man. He had to remind me to grease my arm to the elbow in advance!
R and I played again. He said men had been rough with his hole earlier in the night and asked me to be as well. No problem! Later, I got to put my hand in his ass again while he put his in a man in a sling. That’s fast becoming a favorite for us. I love it but it’s hard to find a comfortable position. We’ll have to keep working on it.
I met an very hot, masculine man from out-of-town with a shaved head and longish beard. He had extremely arousing body odor. We really clicked—lot’s of kissing, licking and tit play while he was getting his ass played with and fucked in a sling. We made out later but, unfortunately, didn’t get into anything heavier before he had to go. I’m sure looking forward to seeing him at the next party.
One other guy and I had a lot of chemistry. He’s a big, really hairy, bearish man, younger than me, with a goatee and large pointy sideburns. He spent a lot of time playing with another hot man and I thought they were a couple but it turns out they weren’t. I fucked him a couple of times, first standing up, then twice in a sling. I ended up in the sling for the first time in years. He ate my ass, the other guy kissed me and tweaked my nipples and a third one sucked my dick. Damn. He was the best ass eater I can remember. It felt GREAT! He wanted to fuck me and I would have let him, too, but I wasn’t prepeared, if you know what I mean. We exchanged numbers, so it could still happen.
Every time I felt like I needed a break, I’d go to the refrigerator to get a soda and try to sit down and relax for a while. It never lasted longer than a few minutes before I’d be sticking some part of my anatomy into someone. It was really fun but exhausting and after four hours I really had to leave. Believe it or not I had to resist the temptation to drive to The Phoenix before I went home but resist I did. I’m not showering until morning so I can enjoy the odors while I fall asleep.
The Phoenix and a dud
The Phoenix wasn’t very interesting tonight, not surprising for a Friday night. There’s a small core of men who seem to be there every Friday and Saturday, myself included. Tonight there didn’t seem to be many others. This isn’t so bad in itself. It’s not like I’ve been in town long enough or been busy enough to have had all of them (not for lack of trying), but I was looking for something/someone new.
A local guy sent me his picture in February when I was here for Mardis Gras. I’ve seen him around and figured he lost interest but he started messaging me again this week. Unfortunately, I’ve either been away from the computer or had the sound turned off and couldn’t reply before he’s gone. This guy’s incredibly handsome to me. He came into the Phoenix “play area” tonight. He asked me if I was FrankPtown (my handle at the time) and said he wished we had been able to chat. We negotiated a little and agreed to a one-on-one fuck after we both got done playing at the bar. I wasn’t finding what I wanted and finally decided to just go home before I got cranky, saying good night to him on the way out.
Of course, he messaged me right after I got home and I drove back to The Marigny. He was house sitting in a beautiful condo and I had to rush up the stairs to the third floor so the dog wouldn’t make too much fuss. We got undressed and got right down to it.
Now, I know we had said at the bar that I’d fuck him but I didn’t think that would be the only thing we’d do. Firstly, he refused to kiss, making some excuse about his breath. So I got myself hard and he bent over. He’s a little taller than I am (Who isn’t?!?) and we had to find something that worked. His ass felt really great when I did manage to get in it and I sure was eager to plow him. Between finding a good position, though, and getting some strong whiffs of his poppers, I lost it. (Full disclosure: I told him online that poppers were OK.) I finally said It wasn’t working for me and he asked what I wanted him to do. I knew I could get hard again with some foreplay or something, but he told me he already shot a load when my dick was in his ass. I think he was just being polite but…
Anyway, he’s so good-looking I’d try again but I doubt that’s gonna happen! Sorry, bud.
Johnny Bravo
I am becoming obsessed with a straight man on WebCamNow. His handle is _JohnnyBravo (with the initial underscore). He’s fucking beautiful and he loves showing off his muscles and big dick. I’m a sucker for hairy forearms, chests and pits. He’s got all three and great biceps and traps and a beautiful ass, too. Tonight he was beating off and playing with his girlfriend’s tits while she read an electronics manual! I swear. She would stop reading and suck his dick every once in a while. She couldn’t keep him hard, though. I could!!
He does construction restoration and says he’ll be in NOLA in February for a job and will look me up. Sure he will! I don’t believe it for a second but what the hell? It’ll give me something to live for until then. Why else would he give me his e-mail address, right?
He said Hi to me tonight. Sigh.
Friday night he’s doing a “show” for a couple of hours, starting sometime between 5PM and 6PM PST. I'm not sure what that means, but I’ll be there!
